Home Sweet Home.....but not for long

So I'm sitting in my mother's room at home. Laying around, watching Beetlegeuse, and socializing on IM. I came home tuesday night because I felt like my last days were gonna be spent in a dorm room and I was not goin out like that. I have been sooooo sick for quite sometime. My wonderful mommy came and rescued me from the evil environment of school. I found out at the emergency room that I am real sick and have been put on bed rest. But I also believe that it could have been psychological. The moment I was home I felt ten times better. But then I was instantly stressed because there is only a like 2 more weeks left of school and I have so much stuff to be doing. So many commitments I have to go through with. Just my luck, I have been feeling like the most unluckiest person in the universe lately. If something bad can happen it has happened to me over the last few months. I've been trying to take everything with a grain of salt (whatever that means) but I can only grin-and-bear-it for so long. So I am home and it feels great. I love this place. But I am lonely and still feel bad because of the sickness. And I'm finally hungry. And I mean I want a whole pizza, 3 double cheeseburgers, chilli cheese fries and a few steaks type hungry. My older man called me today and I have been in the air every since. He is amazing, we have such a weird connection. I mean he said he called to see how I was doing. I haven't talked to him in a good few weeks. Turns out when he calls I am bed ridden and home. How crazy. He definetly put a smile on my face today. But then I got to think how lonely I am again. Almost everyone and I mean EVERYONE in my sorority is going to our formal this weekend. I thought me and a few other people weren 't goin but turns out now that I'm pretty much the only one. I can't even go anyway if I could. Not allowed. Then I was thinking how much I'm ready for a boyfriend. I know I know. This whole thing again. I just need that security. I'm getting so bored with my current situation a want a change. But my older man can't be my boyfriend and school is almost over and I really don't want a boyfriend over the summer because I plan on running buck wild (as always) so I guess I'm just stuck in this state for awhile. AAAAAAGAGGGHHHHHHHH! I feel like rippin my hair out. And now all this blogging is making me fatigued I'm outtie. only for a lil bit.