And there off!

The school year is upon me. Today was my third day of classes. I haven't bought one book yet, I've signed up for 18 credits this semester, I've been to two happy hours this week that lasted until 9 or 10 o'clock and I plan on auditioning for the musical tonight. Moving in was tiring. Of course because of all my shit it was a little more troublesome than it had to be. Now that I'm back I almost feel like I never left. That's scary. I was home for a very long time, now I feel like all that is nothing. Well my summer was pretty much nothing anyway. I really wished I had of moved off campus this year. I don't know what I was thinking. But I really doubt I'll even be in my room much this year anyway. My week so far has been good. I have been having a lot of fun and I'm rarely by myself, which is the one thing that really drives me crazy especially when I first get up here. I'm not home sick yet but I can't wait for people to come visit me. Hopefully I'll have more visitors this year. The lil bro is having fun at school too. I miss him but I'm so happy for him. I think he is going to have some of the best times of his life in college. Like me. Mom's trip is this weekend and I'm excited for her. For the last 5 years or so all she ever talked about was moving to Arizona now she finally gets to go and see what it's all about. This holiday weekend ought to be fun. I've decided to stay up here for it, so be prepared for the details.

It's almost time

That time has come again. Back to school time. What a fucking drag. I just got in from taking my little brother to school. Wow, I can't believe he is in college on his own. And I can't believe even more that I actually get emotional thinking about it. I have no doubt in my mind that he wont be ok. I just worry about him ya know. I wonder if anybody worried about me. Lord knows I had a sad couple of first weeks when I first went to school. Well at least he has a roommate (even if he does stutter a little bit). I saw and old friend this week and patched some things up with a not so old friend. It felt good. I realized today that I have been friends with this person for almost 2 years. That's a long time. It went by pretty fast though. But I'm glad we still are friends and I hope it stays that way. Another pair of friends of mine just started new jobs as highschool teachers. I think that is the most fasinating thing ever. I just can't believe I'm friends with highschool teachers. I just got outta highschool myself seems like. Well..... in other news, when I took the person's name outta my phone last week he called like the next day. I've said it before I'll say it again "I'm the poster child for Murphy's Law" or what ever you wanna call this. It's crazy. But after I saw him I had no desire to see him or talk to him again. It's like I was illing but I got my fix and now I'm good. I hope I stay this way for a long time.

Pre-Season

NFL pre-season started this week and that makes me happy. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE football. Watching it makes me so happy and calm and, in a sense, hopeful. I don't know what I'm hopeful for though.
I have been slipping in my situation. I really need to check myself. So today I took a person's name outta my phone. That doesn't mean I don't know the number but I'm hoping in time I will forget. That way I'll be forced to move on a bit.
This week is my last week at the warehouse. HALLELUJAH!!!! I will be soooooo freakin happy thursday at 5:30 you don't even know.
School starts really soon too. So i guess pre-season for education is upon me as well. My mother finally booked her trip to Arizona. She is going next month on her birthday. I asked her when she plans on leaving for good and she thinks next fall. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to do so that I'm not homeless before I graduate college.

Thinking at work

Many things go through my mind
Thoughts of life and moments
Of how sitting on the toliet in my bathroom I thought "This moment that I'm living right now will be nothing more than a memory".
My life will go on and undoublty end
And what happens then is there something more or will I just disappear and forget
Or even worst be forgotten

Hurry for August

July was one of the most horrible months I have ever had. I don't even want to talk about it because I might jinks my August. I knew once something really bad happened to me at the end of July things could only go up. I really hit rock bottom and I kinda mean that literally. August has been good to me. The person I thought I lost is coming around. Slowly but surely. I saw him in the beginning of August and just this past weekend he initiated a conversation and he even called. I came into some extra money from my job and I have generally been happy. I need to find something to do with my baby. My mother really wants him out. I'm almost positive if she had a gun she would have been shot him. It makes me upset though to think that I really have to give him away. I really don't know what else to do. And besides (I feel bad saying this) but I really want a dog and I know he would never allow that to happen. It will just make him feel even worst about things. Why are cats so difficult? This is really ridiculous.